Many wives become frustrated with their husbands when he won’t venture out. She wonders why he won’t go hiking or biking with her. She has pestered him to take the family skiing yet he continues to refuse the opportunities for fun and excitement. She just doesn’t understand. He can’t give her reason and may not know himself. It’s just that he has this innate response of “No”. So, what is happening? There can be a few reasons why your husband is hesitant. It may be depression, in which case this would need to be addressed and talked about, since there are solutions. Stress can cause depression and if he is feeling overwhelmed with work, bills, and family responsibility, he may be sinking into a mild low.
If depression is not it, then it could be the idea that when the family gets together , it ends up in arguments, tears and drama. He has learned to stay home where he won’t feel trapped with frustrations of family chaos.
Another viable reason is the reality that he knows he is the sole provider or at least the biggest contributor to the family household. The weight of knowing that if something happens to him physically, he may be out of commission and not be able to take care of his family in the ways that protect them.
The question is why is your husband boring, but he also may be protective and not even realize it. When suggesting an activity that could somehow compromise his ability to provide it might be best to refrain from strenuous ones. He may be young and virile, but he might also feel vulnerable and would prefer to do something that is less challenging.
Talk to him and let him know that you appreciate his role as the financial provider and would be open to doing something fun on his terms. Be prepared that it may not be your idea but the bottom line is being together and having a collective experience and make memories.
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